As Pillars grow old.

Over the last one week  we have been engaging with a poem titled 'Rabbi Ben Ezra' by Robert Browning. So our professor shared his personal experiences, how his close people crossed the old-age stage and how he made them embrace that difficult phase happily with his love and support.

I was reminded of the poem that I wrote about OLD AGE. If you haven't read it, you could find it on my blog,give it a read. So not everyone accepts that phase easily. It could become a happy journey if there are people like our professor, who become parents for them, who spend time with them, who are ready to listen to all their tantrums, yet pour only love.

And we, as adults, are going to encounter that stage in some years. Before that, the worst thing is that our parents — who have been our pillar since we were born  are going to need support soon. No old age homes, no luxury hotels, no nurses could give that support except us.

As I’ve seen this quote on Instagram —  “They ( parents) too are living their first life.” So when they ask a doubt in handling the phone, there is nothing wrong in teaching them, though it could be the fifth time you are doing it. There is nothing wrong in listening to them, though it could be repeated stories, as they were — and are — never tired of listening to yours. There is nothing wrong in looking at their faces and talking, since from our birth, their world has been our faces.

Today, my grandma was on call with my mother. We sent her some snacks. She knows that all this online kind of shopping exists. But for a moment, she was awestruck — wondering how all this is happening. She said that, being there in Chennai, you are ordering snacks from my nearby bakery in the town.

And my mother started explaining how this works, like it’s a big network; if you have a phone in your hand, it’s like the town is in our hands, and all that. That explanation went on for five minutes, and in every pause she kept saying, “HMM”, “OH” — moments of surprise.

And here my point is her patience and her thirst for learning at this age. She listened, and she became aware of this. And my mother, too, kept explaining, solving all her doubts — though for us it might sound silly, but not for her.

But at times, we don’t have the patience to listen to our parents, and when something new is taught to us, few feel inferior instead of actually learning.

I’m not generalising that all parents are kind to their children, neither are all kids. I know the other side too — who call abuse and ignorance love.

But the remaining population who do care deserve this treatment. They deserve love, care, affection, patience, and long-lasting support.

There is a scene from 'BAD GIRL' , a recently released Tamil film by Varsha Bharath. In that scene, the heroine realises her mother is becoming old. She says:

 “My mother is 60 years old. She has grey hair. How did I never notice?”

And there is a close-up shot of her mother — with tired eyes, dark circles, and wrinkles. That smile and excitement every time she sees her daughter. The next moment, she hugs her mother. That overwhelmed, elated, proud, fulfilling — all those years of longing and mixed emotions — could be seen on her mother’s face after receiving that hug.

She says, “Love you, ma. You are an amazing mom.” Since the beginning of the film, she had never been this happy.

Like us, they too need appreciation, comfort, and warm hugs, 'As pillars do need support.'